My mom was remarried by the time I was almost 5. She married a criminal who turned our world upside down. My mother was not in good health neither was my little sister. That man let us be evicted, let our car be repossessed and watch him be arrested. When my mom married that idiot she told my dad that we didn’t need him because we moved on. My dad had no idea that my mom had married a criminal.
There is no tobacco, illegal substance usage in my home. We have a celebratory bottle of wine in storage and some hard cider in our refrigerator for years. I saw to it that my children always had someone to vent to about their dad and I. We always have our bills paid making it a priority. Neither my husband nor I have a criminal history. My children rarely wore hand-me-downs. Being I had a boy and a girl you can understand why. My kids always had choices of foods at home or we got take out. If we were having financial difficulties I applied for food stamps. My children never knew that. Because it wasn’t necessary. What was important was prioritized their health and safety. The difficulties at school I left to the school to help them with accommodations when needed and tutoring . Both of my children are successful adults. * I was never able to pursue a bachelors degree because my brain cannot process beyond basic mathematics. But I do know and recognize my limitations
When I was born my parents marriage was in utter shambles. They were too immature to be parents. They were divorced before I was three. My dad worked in retail management. My mom went to college and got a bachelor’s degree in social work. That was by day. At night waa another world.
Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support.
I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized.
he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that.
he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened.
he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence.
i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me
i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction.
after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly.
things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it.
we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe …
our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far?
this has upset me so much its hard to even function.
So that set me up for an unsafe environment.
As time passed my mom married again. She married a man who bet a pool game to get my mother. ( indoor bar room). There was drinking and drug use as a daily practice. And then came the sexual predator abuse to my sisters and I.
My mom just wanted to be a stay at home mom and being married to this guy made no guarantee. We always had a roof over our head, our clothing was from thrift stores or hand me downs. However because of our home being without a working furnace there were many times we lacked hot water. We didn’t go to the doctor or dentist for regular checkups. I also was bullied at school for my shabby clothes or just because. The bullying never stopped. In recollection I am not sure which was safer, because I didn’t have a type of mom who would listen about my being bullied, and her husband’s abuse towards me.
Why are white women not interested in dating Asian men? Are they not attractive to you at all?
I went on to have two beautiful children who I did my best to raise. I am constantly in therapy. I have had surgeries to correct some of the negligence I suffered.
